Executive Decisions- A Quick Peek Inside

Executive Decisions Book CoverORDER YOUR COPY HERE

The little book that’s big on personal responsibility is HERE! In our society, many of us are wandering through life, living for the weekend, and being a slave to our excuses. We are overwhelmed, we are lonely, yet we are pretending that we have everything in order, when in truth we have no inner peace and no clear direction. We have become clever in our laziness and sloppy in our actions, because we are not thinking clearly about our lives. It’s time to think about the way we are thinking.

This book is for people who want to stop just being clever and actually possess wisdom. It is especially ideal for people who want to truly be excellent instead of just pretending that they are, which is a matter of changing from within. It is for every person who is willing to “pay the cost to be the boss” and wants to go from a half-lived life to a truly abundant life.

BOOK CONTENTS
Dedication
Acknowledgements
Preface
Introduction
Best Practices for Life Business

Chapter 1 – Executive Decision #1: Develop TRUE Self-Confidence

Opening Quote: “We gain strength, courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face…We must do that which we think we cannot.”
-Eleanor Roosevelt

• Issue: Feeling insecure, but displaying bravado
How insecurity is like a house built on the sand
• Issue: Being self-absorbed
There’s freedom in realizing that it’s not all about you
• Issue: Fear of correction

The medicine that is necessary for greatness

Chapter 1 helps the reader to understand the power of true self-confidence, what it looks like, what it does NOT look like, and how it serves them to develop it in a healthy, productive manner.

Chapter 2 – Executive Decision #2: Cultivate Integrity

Opening Quote: “Be Impeccable With Your Word. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.” ~Miguel Angel Ruiz

• Issue: Being Unprincipled
And therefore, easily manipulated

• Issue: Being Entitled
Why no one owes you anything

• Issue: Being Ungrateful
And being constantly miserable because of it

• Issue: Being Self-Made Victims
Discerning your excuses from the truth

Chapter 2 explains how self-evaluation and personal, undisclosed high standards serve us on our way to being the person we truly want to become.

Chapter 3 – Executive Decision #3: Develop an Understanding Mindset

Opening Quote: “The power of intuitive understanding will protect from harm until the end of your days.” ~Lao Tzu

• Issue: Being Impatient
How instant gratification habits can ruin you

• Issue: Picking the Wrong Friends
Only the right support system will get you where you strive to go

• Issue: Having Unsuitable Romantic Relationships
Are you being depleted or replenished?

• Issue: Ingesting Mind Poison
A poor mental diet is a recipe for disaster

Chapter 3 explains how many have no wisdom and very little understanding, but they are what allow us to attract the right people, as well as identify and take advantage of the right opportunities.

Chapter 4 – Executive Decision #4: Seek Inner Peace
Success isn’t measured by money or power or social rank. Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace. ~Mike Ditka

• Issue: Being Materialistic
Are you enjoying your things or just fighting to get/keep them?

• Issue: Lacking Spiritual Foundation

The case for developing a spiritual means of support
Chapter 4 explains to the reader how developing inner peace brings true joy whether you are living in a penthouse or a park, and how that ultimately leads to true success.

Chapter 5 – Executive Decision #5: Live In Excellence

Opening Quote: “The quality of a person’s life is in direct proportion to their commitment to excellence, regardless of their chosen field of endeavor.” –Vince Lombardi

• Issue: Being Lazy
A little elbow grease never hurt anybody

• Issue: Avoiding Accountability
Sometimes, it is your fault

Chapter 6 – Conclusion: No More Excuses

“Argue for your limitations, and sure enough they’re yours.” ~Richard Bach
• Changing your language about where you are in your life
You don’t have to condemn yourself to make positive changes

The Companion Exercises in the back of the book are intended to make the reader take the first action step of writing down where he is in his life, engaging critical thinking skills and intuition to answer the hard questions.

COMPANION EXERCISES

MY SUCCESS WHEEL
KNOWING MYSELF
MY LIFE PRINCIPLES
5 WONDERFUL THINGS
MY OLD VICTIM STORY/MY NEW VICTORY STORY
DESTINATION DISEASE TREATMENT
THE FRIEND TEST
THE PARTNER TEST
MY NEW MENTAL DIET
MY ACCOUNTABILITY PRACTICE
START WITH SILENCE

 

It’s true. It has already been done before (and 3 reasons why you should do it anyway).

Getting Your Mind Right For the Life You Want

There are so many times that I have thought of an idea, loved it, and looked into taking next steps into making it happen. Then, that annoying little defeatist voice in my head (that we all have, admit it!) says, “Meh, it’s already been done before.”

But my inner authority will snap back, “AND?! So what if it’s been done already? It’s time for ME to do it now!”

And that’s what I want to tell you today: that even if it’s already been done, if you feel the pull to do it, then you have to do itHere are 3 reasons why:

1. There are many people and businesses that need to be served, and the person/people who did it before can’t do it all. Here’s an example: Along with coaching, I do business systems consulting (also called business analysis). This is awesome work that also happens to be in very high demand, and there are many more talented people needed in this field . When I first looked into venturing into this territory, I saw that there were quite a few business analysts/process consultants out there, but I also could tell from the strong response that I got from companies and decision makers that my skill set was also needed, so I didn’t count myself out. I honed my skills, created interest, and got a contract for myself. No way that would have happened if I let myself get discouraged because there were other active players in the field. There was room for me, and there is room for you.

2. There are people and businesses that are your direct assignment. These people and businesses are meant for YOU. The circumstances of life have become such that YOU are the one who is supposed to coach them, or speak to them, or build their digital empire. That being said, if you do not do it, those people/businesses will miss your gift, and you will miss your sense of fulfillment. Everyone gets cheated. You don’t want that, do you?

3. The way you do “it” may be the breakthrough approach that gets through where others have not. We all have a particular approach to doing things, be that explaining a concept, writing a business case, or painting a picture. There may be 5,213,456 other people explaining that concept, but you will say it in a certain way that will get through where those others could not. Don’t underestimate your authority and your ability in the world by not giving that a shot. Also, many people like to hear the same concept spun in many different ways. I certainly do. I have read literally hundreds of book and listened to thousands of hours of lectures on personal development and maximizing results, and I’ve gleaned at least one gem from almost everything I’ve listened to, even the concepts I disagreed with. What are those little gems you’re holding inside/hiding that you’re keeping to yourself? Don’t be stingy! :)

In the end, we came here to live life to the fullest, and a big part of that means doing what you feel led to do. Be encouraged, step out on faith, and do what you came here to do. Your gifts are needed.

Time

In about 3 hours, it will no longer be February 3, 2015. This day is not coming back. Ever. What did you do with it? One thing I’m re-learning is that almost every one of us is acting like this is a rehearsal. We’re acting like we get to have February 3, 2015 again someday, so we sacrifice our health for work, we put off calling the people we love, we let silly things like complaining and misery and judgement and competition steal our energy and time.

I’m guilty of this too, but I am no longer going to do this. I am going to protect my health, energy, and time, because I only get ONE go-round on this ride. My life is for ME, for my husband, for my baby, for my family and friends. I want to encourage you all to do the same. Get ready for people to be pissed at you because you’re changing, because you won’t “suck it up” and be miserable with them, or because THEY THINK that you think you’re suddenly better. Then watch them fade away as you commit yourself to drinking in every moment of this precious and finite life. You will be much more satisfied with how you lived from this day forward.

Sometimes, Elevation Requires ISOLATION

Motivation

First of all, I hope everyone is having a phenomenal new year! I’m so looking forward to 2015’s wonderful surprises.

Well, I took an entire year to continue developing and enjoying my new life in a new town, with a new husband (woo-hoo), and a new project! During this time, I really vacillated between ramping up or scaling down the business at Optimism Matters, not because I didn’t want to do this anymore, but because I felt really stuck as far determining the direction I wanted the company to go, and everything I was doing seemed to be falling flat or deeply unsatisfying.

Then, I finally realized a few things:

I was letting my business guide me instead of guiding my business. I got distracted from my original mission and focused on Optimism Matters as a commodity and not for its purity. What I mean by this is that I originally began this endeavor to help people develop holistically, with a HUGE emphasis on living one’s truth, taking care of one’s physical/emotional/spiritual health, and finding joy and peace. I went into corporations with this mission as well, but began to overemphasize the business development, professional development, and achievement aspects. I allowed the large corporate engagements I won to dictate the direction I had taken the company in at the time, and it started to feel impure, for lack of a better word. I was wrong to do this, but I didn’t know how to make it right. That’s why I considered backing off from OMI altogether.

When you don’t know what to do, do nothing. But something told me to just be still and not make any moves. So I didn’t. For most of the year. This decision was in direct opposition to my nature of being an overachiever that always has to be making moves. Talk about scared, I was mortified. It takes a lot of courage to do nothing.

That’s why the name of this blog is “Sometimes, Elevation Requires Isolation” (thanks Jason Lester!), because I literally had to isolate my corporate work (and myself) from Optimism Matters and think about why I created it.

A slash career/multi-faceted work is the wave of the future.I am happy to say that I’ve come out on the other side. I began to ask, “Well, why CAN’T I be a kick ass business systems consultant AND a personal development coach? Where is the rule that I have to pick one or the other? Aren’t organizations and people served when they feel effective at work and fulfilled at home?”

You have to remember your passion. With that, I have re-established the mission of Optimism Matters to help others find joy, peace, and balance, whether they are a CEO or an artist (or both!). And with that I feel free again. I feel full of wonderful topics to write about, because Optimism Matters will no longer cater to corporate subjects only. I have allotted part of OMI to be geared towards that, because I am an analyst/consultant and that’s a part of who I am as well, and I want to honor that, but it doesn’t rule the roost here anymore. This is a place where business processes AND individual processes are examined, re-calibrated, and maximized.

Does this hit home for you? Is it time for YOU to isolate yourself so you can get to your next level? Let me know in the comments below!

Happy 2015, everyone. Let’s make it a great one.

Love,

Nikkita Nguyen

Executive Decisions: How to Take Responsibility for Your Life and Become the Most Excellent Version of Yourself

Executive Decisions Book Cover

ORDER YOUR COPY HERE

In our society, many of us are wandering through life, living for the weekend, and being a slave to our excuses. We are overwhelmed, we are lonely, yet we are pretending that we have everything in order, when in truth we have no inner peace and no clear direction. We have become clever in our laziness and sloppy in our actions.

This book is for people who want to stop just being clever and actually possess wisdom. It is especially ideal for reforming B.S. artists (I was one of them!) who want to truly be excellent instead of just pretending that they are. It is for every person who is willing to “pay the cost to be the boss” and wants to go from a half-lived life to a truly abundant life.

Executive Decisions Intro Video

Group discounts are available for both books and programs.
Email N.Nguyen@OptimismMatters.com for more info.

EXECUTIVE DECISIONS: PREFACE

This book was born out of love and frustration.

One of the wonderful gifts I believe I have been given is my capacity to love people from all walks of life, coupled with a deep desire to see everyone be prosperous and happy. Throughout the years, I have coached many people around personal development issues, and my intention to see them have the life they truly desire is the fuel that keeps me going every day in my work. My frustration comes in when I see people constantly getting in their own way. Don’t get me wrong, I completely understand how and why we do this as human beings, because I certainly used to get into my own way (and still do once in a blue moon). The thing is, we live in misery for years on end just because we won’t take the necessary steps to make our life happen the way we want it to, and often we don’t know what steps to take or how to even get started. This is what this book is about.

When I went to the MBA program at La Salle University in Philadelphia, I fell in love with the language of business. It allowed me to look at things objectively, and to measure situations by the results produced. In my personal transformation, I decided to apply business concepts to my life and take inventory of myself. This sounds very cold, but it is not, because when you think about it, we are all in business: The business of living. WE are the CEOs of our lives, and most of us are running a sloppy business. In fact, it is safe to say that the business is probably running us instead of the other way around.

For many years, I ran a sloppy business. I was self-righteous, flaky, insecure, and controlling, and I was clever enough to get away with it. But when I started to evaluate my life, my results did not match my objectives (desires), because I was not doing things in a righteous manner. I knew that if I wanted different results, I would have to make some serious changes. I realized that I had to pay the cost to be the boss.

A boss is the person who makes an executive decision and moves forward in good faith with that decision. The boss may take others’ opinions into consideration, but at the end of the day, the boss knows that the final decision and responsibility lie with him, so he does not mind if everyone else disagrees with his decision, because he is doing what is in the best interest of his business. He is willing to do this because he knows that this is the only way he will be successful. So the question for you reading this right now is: Are you a truly a boss? Are you ready and willing to become one?

This book is NOT for the faint of heart. This book is NOT for the excuse-maker, this book is NOT for the person who wants to stay in his or her misery, and this book is not for the incorrigible critic. Also, please do NOT read this book if you are offended by strong language, unconventional approaches, or feeling convicted, because all of that is in the contents of this book.

This book is for everybody who is tired of TALKING about being a boss and is ready to actually BE a boss. This book is for anyone who is ready to take responsibility for his or her life, but just doesn’t know where to begin or how to really put good ideas into action. This book is for the people who are ready to get their money right, to finally have healthy, wonderful relationships, to do the work they know they were called to do, to truly be on top of their game, and most importantly, to TRULY love themselves.

If you are broke, if you feel broken, if you are lonely, if you are frustrated, if you are overwhelmed, if you feel that your heart is cold, if you feel you are running out of time, or if you feel out of control of the direction of your life, I encourage you to read this book and use the supplemental workbook. There is sure to be at least ONE idea that changes your whole life.

“Everyone is going to die, but not everyone is going to live.” -Dr. Christiane Northrup

Are you okay with living a half-lived life? Or are you ready to make the executive decisions for your life that will allow you to ACTUALLY live successfully? If you chose the latter, please read on. I hope that you, the reader, are able to find this book useful and most importantly, actionable. I look forward to seeing you on the other side.

Nikkita Nguyen

I Know Why You’re Stuck

Main points of this blog:

• You waste creative energy on feeling sorry for yourself
• You won’t listen to “the big ME”
• You’re trying to fit an old box that YOU created, but you’ve outgrown
• You’re trying to live your life according to other people’s expectations
• You won’t stand up for yourself

So many people are stuck in a rut and at the end of their wits. We’ve all been there, right? In my experience, I get out of my stuck place when I realize why I’m stuck. (This has worked on people I have coached as well.) So, considering that, here are some reasons as to why you might be stuck.

YOU WASTE YOUR CREATIVE ENERGY ON FEELING SORRY FOR YOURSELF. This takes up SO much energy. It clutters the mind and drains the emotions. It puts you in a weird cycle of dissatisfaction and lethargy. I remember one day I was feeling particularly sorry for myself, laying on my couch and looking at the ceiling, thinking about how unfair I thought my life was. I remember hearing “the big ME” say, “And what exactly are you doing right now? Telling yourself a sad story? How exactly is that helping you? What could you be doing right now instead? You’d be much happier if you were actually taking action as opposed to laying here telling yourself a victim story. Get mad and do something about it!”

As always, “the big ME” was right.

YOU WON’T LISTEN TO “THE BIG ME.” Ignoring this person is the reason many live unfulfilled. Everyone has a “big ME”. It is the complete, delicious, bad-ass version of you. The one who takes no prisoners, knows his or her value and goes for the gold. Who’s your higher self? Mine looks like Kerry Washington but talks like Alec Baldwin’s character in “Glengarry Glen Ross” (don’t judge me). It’s a combination of 2 bad-asses telling me to suck it up and get it together, because that’s the only way I’ll get where I really want to be. I suppose it’s very fitting that my “big ME” is a combination of two big screen actors. Think about it. How many movies have you seen where the person is feeling sorry for herself and someone out of nowhere says, “Oh, you poor thing. Here’s the money you need. Here’s the life you want. You’ve experienced enough angst here on this couch/bed/barstool. You deserve this.”

Hell no.

What do we see in the movies (especially the ones about real life successful people)? They get beat up, everyone around them doubts them, tells them they’re crazy, tells them to give up and go get a real job/just be like everybody else. But you know the funniest thing that all these people have in common? THEY CAN’T GIVE UP. Even when they don’t have any money. Even when they look like fools. Even when they’ve failed a hundred times. They can’t give up because they will die if they do. And that’s what I realized about myself. I couldn’t just give up and settle into some 9 to 5 with no growth potential indefinitely (although there’s nothing wrong with that if it is a means to an end or your personal preference), because I would be so miserable I wouldn’t be myself anymore. My essence would die. Let me tell you, that’s a powerful and freeing realization. So now what do you do when you realize that? What do you do when you know you HAVE TO, HAVE TO, HAVE TO follow your dreams even if it’s not going to make sense to anyone else?

Answer: Get ready for the fallout and hold on to your posterior with both hands. And after that, prepare for the delicious success that is sure to be yours because you persevered and made those sacrifices.

YOU’RE TRYING TO STUFF YOURSELF INTO AN OLD BOX THAT YOU’VE OUTGROWN. So often, we hear that we need to “think outside of the box,” but I don’t think most of us realize that the hardest boxes to get out of are the ones that WE create for ourselves. Sure, we have the boxes of expectation put on us by society, our families, our friends, etc., but the boxes we internalize get us in the most trouble. The funniest thing about those boxes is that they’re almost invisible to us. We know we’re doing something wrong, we just can’t seem to put our finger on it.

This is why we need outside help.

I’ve had my own challenge of being stuck inside of a box that I created, and that I actually enjoyed being in for a long time. And then I hit the wall. I could not get anything done, because I had actually grown to a higher level but wanted to play it safe. I had a sneaking suspicion of this, but really realized it when I went to the Million Dollar Consulting ®College for the first time. My mentor, Dr. Alan Weiss, helped me realize I wasn’t thinking big enough. Now I’ve created even more aggressive goals for myself and they have invigorated me in so many amazing ways.

YOU ARE TRYING TO LIVE ACCORDING TO OTHER PEOPLE’S EXPECTATIONS. This is true of all relationships in life, but particularly in romantic relationships. Some are in committed relationships with people who are encouraging you to do the exact opposite of what you feel so strongly led to do. How do you reconcile that? Well, maybe you can and maybe you can’t, but you must love yourself AND your partner enough to take the risk. Why? Because if you live a half-lived life, it will manifest in your relationship with your spouse/significant other. You will resent him/her, you will stifle a big part of yourself, and then what of your relationship? The person you love so much will not even get all of you. They will get glimpses of you. You will have a mediocre relationship because you are living up to mediocre standards. Do you really want that?

You must be honest with your partner about your needs, for your sake and your partner’s sake. Be patient with them and give them time to catch up, but always be you.

YOU WON’T STAND UP FOR YOURSELF. There is nothing more intoxicating than the feeling of standing up for yourself. It doesn’t have to be dramatic, it just has to be true. You must find the strength to say, “You know what? This is me, and this is all I can be. Take it or leave it.” There should be NO negativity underneath what you say, because you are choosing freedom for yourself and allowing the other person to have freedom as well. They are FREE to not accept you, and you are FREE to walk away.

SO, WHAT TO DO? I would give you a long list of ways to get unstuck, but you’ll just make a long to-do list that makes you feel good but that you probably won’t act on. That is not necessary anyway, because you already know what you need to do, which is take action. Action works miracles. Just taking steps in the direction of where you want to go will boost your confidence tremendously. So take one action today. TODAY. Make a confession, make a phone call, write a business proposal. Do SOMETHING. You will gain momentum if you just get started.

Let’s do it! I’m rooting for all of us.

Nikkita Nguyen

KNOWING WHEN TO CHANGE

If you are person who constantly strives to be better, you probably notice that at times, you seem to plateau in certain areas of your life. At that point, it’s time to take inventory of yourself. What needs to change? Here are 5 areas to consider:

1. THE COMPANY YOU KEEP. Who are your friends? Are they helping you grow? Are they challenging you to be better? Do they hold you accountable?

2. YOUR VOCATION. How do you feel about your work? Do you feel stimulated? Do you feel that your work serves a higher purpose?

3. YOUR INNER STRENGTH. Where are you spiritually? Do you have or are you developing an invisible means of support?

4. YOUR LOVE LIFE. What of your romantic partnership? Do you currently have one of substance? Do you desire one? Are you working on developing into the equivalent of the person you would like to be in partnership?

5. YOUR TIME. How are you using your time? Are you using it with wisdom or are you squandering it? How might you use your time more effectively?

These are just a few questions to start with to get out of your stuck place. I recommend picking one of these areas and answering the questions honestly and creating one action step for yourself this week that you believe that will get you a little closer to where you truly desire to be in your life.

Have faith and go forward.

OMI Podcast, Episode 3: Approval Independence, Part 1

The desire to have the approval of others can have a crippling effect on our ability to grow as individuals. Seeking the acceptance or approval of others as a motivator can be a slippery slope. In part one of today’s podcast, we explore the ups and downs of approval seekers, and those who thrive in spite of it. Visit the OMI Podcasts page for more episodes!